Slippery
by selenehekate
Summary: Hugo is stuck and can't move. The only way to free him is to use something... slippery. However, what Ron has in mind to free their son is a little different from Hermione's idea... Oneshot.


"Mummy! Mummy!"

Hermione raced towards the kitchen, hurrying in the direction of the shouts. "I'm here, Hugo. Mummy's- Hugo! What happened?"

Wedged into the doggie-door that Harry had helped her install earlier in the week was her little four year old son, scratches covering his arms from when he'd tried to pull himself through the opening. Tears shown in his deep brown eyes, and Hermione could feel panic taking hold of her. "I'm stuck," her son wailed.

"It's okay. It's all going to be okay," Hermione soothed, bending down to rub Hugo's back. "Don't worry, baby. Mummy's going to fix this, all right? She can... Ron! Ron, come here! I need your help. Ron!"

Within seconds, a mop of red hair appeared. Her husband frowned at the sight before him. "Hugo," he said calmly. "What are you doing in Spew's door?" he asked, speaking of the black terrier Ron and Hermione had bought for their children a few months ago. Ron had named him after the cause his wife headed.

Hugo blinked back tears. "Playing."

Ron rolled his eyes. "And you couldn't play with your toy broom like a normal child?"

Hugo stubbornly shook his head. "No."

"I see."

"Whoa!" Ron and Hermione turned, glancing at the doorway where their eldest child, Rose, stood. "What happened?"

"Why don't you go outside, Rose," Hermione said quickly, standing up. Her daughter did _not_ need to see her panic. "Go and play with Spew for awhile."

"But-"

"Listen to your mother, Rose," Ron said, placing his hand on his wife's shoulder. With a growl, their young daughter stomped off, slamming the door to the living room behind her.

Hermione turned on Ron. "What are we going to do?" she asked, semi-hysterical. "How are we going to get him out? We can't use magic on the door without destroying the wall, and Hugo is just stuck there-"

"Calm down," he said quickly, tilting Hermione's head up towards him. He lightly caressed her cheek. "It's going to be all right. If we can just grease him up, he'll slide right out, okay?"

"Grease? He's not dinner, Ronald! He's our son!"

"Mummy," Hugo asked, fear lacing his voice. "Are you gonna eat me?"

Hermione turned to her son, a forced smile on her face. "Of course not, baby." She spun back around. "Ron!"

"All right! Just go and find something slippery, okay? Something that we can rub against him, that will make him slippery." Hermione practically ran from the room, desperate to free her baby. Ron, meanwhile, turned to his son. "How are you doing?"

"My tummy hurts!" he complained.

"We'll have you out of there in a bit, Hugo. Don't worry. But are you ever going to do this again?" The young brunette shook his head. "Good boy."

"I've got it," they heard, Ron turning his head as Hermione raced back into the room. "I've got it, Hugo. Mummy's here."

Ron reached out a hand to steady her. "Here, give it to me. I'll grease him up while you hold him st-" It was then that Ron saw what, exactly, it was that Hermione had brought him to free their son. It was a tube of their... special lubricant. He gave her a weird look, his eyebrows raised as he took it from her.

Bending down, he unscrewed the lid, squeezing a few drops out onto his fingers before he began to rub the lubricant along the sides of his son and the edges of the doggie-door. Hermione was running her fingers through Hugo's hair when he made a face. "It smells like strawberries."

Ron sighed as he glanced over at a blushing Hermione. "It sure does." Great, now every time they had sex, he'd be thinking about his son. "So, were we out of butter, or..."

Her blush deepened. "Well, you said to find something _slippery_, and this was the first thing I could think of..."

"Well, I'm sure he appreciates this as much as I would have," Ron grumbled. "All right," he said, putting the tube down as he reached for his son. "We're going to gently pull on three. Ready? One, two, three!"

With a big yank, they freed Hugo from his imprisonment, and with a cry, Hermione flung herself towards her son, hugging him with all of her might. "My baby! Oh, thank Merlin you're all right, Hugo!"

Ron, on the other hand, was staring sadly down at the empty tube of strawberry-flavored lubricant, wishing that it had been used for something very different.

* * *

This was completed for the naughty portion of the A Little Naught, a Little Nice challenge over at the HPFFCF.

So I'm back from my vacation! I should have the next chapter of Trouble up sometime next week. In the meantime, if you're looking for something to read, check out my Severus Snape oneshot A Serpentine Style, or my Lily/James oneshot Mousetrap.

Thank you so much for all of the reviews! The more I get, the more it encourages me to write! So please RER: Read it, Enjoy it, Review it... and I Love it!

Lurve,

-Selene


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